Friday, April 1, 2011

A Hunter's Prayer

Dear Lord above,
 Please hear me
as I bow my head to pray.
I ask a special blessing
On Turkey Opening Day--
For all the lonely women
who will be left behind
as their men take to the forests
to sit in cold,dark blinds
and stalk the crafty turkey
that wild elusive bird
that drives a sane man crazy.
Lord, I know it is absurd
for a grown man dressed in camo
to behave in such a way
but really, they can't help themselves
on Turkey Opening Day.
It seems they hear a siren call
that lures them to the field--
a distant haunting gobble
to which their soul must yield;
and so they rise at dawn and slip
into the darkened wood
to stalk a tough and stringy bird
that isn't even good.
I've tried to smoke that wild old flesh
until it's fit to eat,
I've marinated all day long
to sweeten wild game meat
and still, no matter how I try
it's never quite as good
as the Butterball from grocers
in my local neighborhood
But even so, they still go forth
and gobble, cluck and call
dressed head to toe in leaves and twigs
they've purchased at the mall.
They've spent enough on hunting gear
to save a small third nation
It's hard to understand, I know,
this turkey fascination.
 So Lord, I ask for  patience
for those that wait at home
as the hunter hunts the hunted
Where the mighty gobbler roams.
Please give us understanding
as to why they act this way
and let them bag their limit
on Turkey opening day.
That's all I ask today, Dear Lord,
but I'll be back again,
For it takes a lot of prayer to live
with turkey hunting men.

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